Car Hunting

I took my client to mass on Saturday evening, as usual, and then she wanted to go to In and Out Burger. (Yeah, they do have the best burgers in town.) On our way to get food, my clutch died. Instantly. Hadn't been slipping or anything. I love that car. '93 Acura Integra. Heck of fun to drive. So, tow to shop, call my buddy to pick me up in the crapmobile (Ford Taurus filled with assorted scary bric-a-brac and used food wrappers.) and got a cab home from the repair shop for my client. Immediate crisis managed. Took Sunday off. Waited Monday to hear the verdict from the Earl.

Bad news - the poor little Acura needs $3000. in repairs. Poor baby always needs repairs - $300 here, $800 there. I work to support my car so I can work so I can support my car. I paid $2200 for it, then my mechanic blew up the engine - put in a new one at her expense. I thought I was lucky and good to go. I've been trying to keep the girl running for 3 years. Not bad, either. A part here, a part there, new seatbelt (what the hell). But the car kicks ass. But the advice is to replace it. I know it is the right thing, even though it is a rough decision.

Now begins the dual tasks of managing anxiety and finding a replacement. So I start looking at Craigslist cheap. I go to strange places to meet poor guys from the Canal who are selling 20 year old Honda Civics for like $1000 to $2000 dollars that look rode hard and put away wet. And the poor guys who are selling them because they had to get a truck because they are working construction or whatever just look crestfallen when I say no. They are these cute little guys who take care of business and work hard, young immigrants, and cute as puppies. I feel like saying "yeah, hey, I'll take over your tired car and dump money into keeping in running because I want you to look happy". Somebody else will buy their car.

Meanwhile, I am going around on the bus and asking everybody for help and so on and so forth. And not sleeping. And stressing. And worrying about work. And thinking I will NEVER be able to get anywhere again because I don't have a car. So everybody says go to St. Vincent's. I look on line, there is a'90 Volvo for $1500 and an '88 Chevy Nova for $1200. Volvo is a station wagon and I don't want to feed anything that much gas. The Nova is a manual (my preference) with a straight, clean body and good tread. Cute as hell. So far so good. (But this guy is always way over blue book value, and I hadn't checked. But this is a hell of old car.) I'm in line behind a guy looking at a newer Saturn for $4000. so I get to spend some quality time with the Nova. Starts up like a champ, shifts gears well. So now I look under the hood.

Yikes. Hoses taped together. Radiator looks rough with dings, but no sign of immediate leakage. Oil spray on a do-gadget McThingy from the engine. Gasket? Something spraying oil out of the engine. I can see sinking a few thousand into it again to keep it going. I like the car - anxiety and ambivilance. I like it. I'm desperate. I'm standing there waiting for the guy looking at the Saturn, but when has a moment I'm asking him what he thinks. He thinks there is spray from the engine. Saturn looks nice, he buys it. While the transaction is going through, I ask if his checked the blue book - nope. Didn't have access. His friend checks. Sho 'nough, dang thing is beautiful, but about $800 over blue book value. I decide to catch the bus home in the rain. Had a day. Call a zillion places, use up my cell minutes, and then panic again.

Now mind you, anxiety is not one of my more basic emotions. I don't tend to do fear. So I don't know what to do. I ask everybody I see to tell me that this will end and that I will be okay. I know this in my head, but I just can't feel it. So I ask them to tell me - ten times. (Most of them make it to time three before they get bored, but since I get told about a total of 15 times a day it works. I whine and wheedle and tell everybody my problems. It helps. A lot.

So, I did look at the cars on the little used lot three blocks to my house. (Love going out to you, Norm at PeteStuff.) There are a couple of decent enough looking cars just above my price range. (No Dear, you can't do the Porsche just because it looks like fun. - I hate being an adult!) There is a Nissan Altima for $4200. Definitely over my limit, but manual, in good shape. I go back and look again. Finally I take the kid with me. She thinks I should get it. We go back again the next day and Norm's there. She wants to know if she can get excited yet. No, you can not get excited yet. I sit in it. Clean inside and out. I drive it. A little difficult getting into first gear but quiet ride, smooth shifting, handles neat. Engine clean, no leaks, all fluids filled, hoses solid. I offer $3800. cash. (I actually did it - I got the car for $3800. cash. Wheeeee!) Okay, Athena you can now be excited. I am happy. I give the guy my Visa card. It doesn't go through - got to talk to the bank blah blah you know the drill. (Okay, I actually got mixed up and gave him my ATM card instead, so no wonder it wouldn't go through.) I pay the next day. I ended paying half cash and putting $2000 on the credit card. Manageable debt, especially since I should not have repair bills for quite a while.
I'm happy. I'm excited. I go to clean out my little Acura, and I am crestfallen. My heart aches. I start it up one last time, wishing I could make it better. I throw my body on it's warm hood as if somehow the contact can make it come back to life. I'd give it mouth to tailpipe resuscitation if I though it might help. I want MY car.

So now, I am glad. I made a good deal. The Nissan will serve me well. I have made a responsible and prudent choice. But, I am having a poor bonding experience. The attachment is just not there. My neighbor says it looks "nice". It does. I want it to look cool, or rad, or something. I want to look at it and think - "this car soooo rocks!" I look at it and wonder if I'm respectable. It worries me. I need to find it a good name - open to suggestions, and bling it out! Maybe put a few dents in it. I dunno. I hope we have a bonding experience soon.